I really don't need an iPhone

Reasons not to get an iPhone:

• I'd probably get cancer of the finger. And the hand. And the side (where it would hang when in my handbag.)
• The price of the phone.
  
• The phone bill.
• I'd forget to look at the kids and they would fall into a pit.
• The end of my social life, as surely no one could be as entertaining.
  
• The end of my marriage, because I would take the Interweb to bed with me.
• I would go application-mad, like I did with Firefox for a while.

On the plus side:

• I would go more places, not being so fused to my computer.
• It would be too much fun.
• I could pick up gay men in my vicinity.
• I would be cool and hip.
• I could write posts immediately when I think about them, instead of composing brilliant ones in my head and forgetting all the cute turns of phrase by the time I get home.
  
• I would go application-mad, like I did with Firefox for a while.
• I would never be bored again. Just flipping it from horizontal to vertical over and over again would keep me enthralled for at least half an hour a day.