How come sleep in the morning is pure bliss and sleep in the evening is the closest you can come to death? The dark thoughts that come at night but never in the morning remind me of the irrational fear of the emptiness after death which is never matched by a fear of the emptiness before conception. (Ah yes, I get deep and thoughtful after midnight.)
It doesn't make sense that I buy a couple more minutes of snooze time off the children by plonking them in front of the TV in the morning, while at night I use that same TV to keep me awake for another little while. I understand that it would make more sense to turn this around. And yet, it's a mathematical certainty that I will only climb into bed seven hours before the very last possible time I have to get back up again.
And what is it that makes nighttime alone time seem so much more delicious than morning alone time anyway? (Delicious until the light goes out and the demons appear, obviously.) I quite like the morning when I get to see it.
I'm off to meditate death away again. In about an hour's time.
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I like to be the first one up. I like the quiet. And usually I fall asleep the second my head hits the pillow.
ReplyDeleteMy trouble comes later. Usually about 2 AM. I wake up and worry and think about whatever it is and there is absolutely no chance of getting back to sleep until 3 AM. This isn't every night, but it does happen in spells.
@Steph - See, I need to do it like you then. Apart from the bit in the middle, of course.
ReplyDeleteMy demons are many and they usually join me at 3am. We often prance and dance the rest of the night away until about 5.30am, when I finally go back to sleep only to be woken by the alarm at 6.20am. Sleep is for the weak :-)
ReplyDeleteI want to know why it was SO much easier when we were children? I'm sure there is an argument for the naïveté of children but I think it must also be physiological. And you're super preggers which is crap for sleeping.
ReplyDeleteMy friend, who is a social worker / therapist, diagnosed herself with nighttime irrationality (she made it up) and just doesn't allow herself to make decisions after 9:00 p.m. until the sun is up and she's had coffee.
ReplyDeleteI do agree, pregnancy is very bad for sleep. Like newborns and birthing.
As someone who often (ok, every night) sleeps with a 2 year old in her bed, I have often been woken by Hamish tossing and turning and whispering "sausage" in my ear. Oh to have demons like that.
ReplyDeleteI just told my mind to shut the f... up years ago and since have slept blissfully the whole night through......well I don't have a husband or little kids anymore, so no interuptions.
ReplyDeleteThoughts of death and a fear of emptiness? Nope. I guess I am way too shallow to go that deep. Off for a nap now. x
ReplyDeleteah..i dont wanna start to tell you about my sleeping behaviours..or rather of my non-sleeping..of my dates with my demons at night..maybe thats why i always get up so early..and love to be up early...when the world is all quiet..and i m the only one awake..when the world is mine...
ReplyDeleteI will put up with any amount of tiredness during the day in order not to spend time with my thoughts in the dead of night.
ReplyDelete@Countess - At least I generally sleep once I fall asleep. That's something.
ReplyDelete@All This Trouble - I don't remember it being that much easier when I was a child. Maybe when I was very small. I used to read books all night, with a flashlight under the covers.
@GingerB - Now that is a good idea. On the other hand, I'm not bright enough in the morning to make any decisions either.
@fiona - Sausage. Now that is a good one.
@Sandi - I need to do that! I may just do that.
@Metropolitan Mum - I want to be that shallow! I would pay good money to be that shallow! (Just cleverer I reckon.)
@Danielle - Much better idea. Really.
@Pueblo girl - Yeah. It would be so much better if we all lived in the same square or something. We could meet for drinks until we're tired enough.
I felt exactly this way when I was pregnant and all other days of my life. I am such a night person and anti-morning person.
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