Having been stuck in the house for weeks now with the whole family playing musical illnesses (even on our weekend away three of us were sick), I have convinced myself that Snickers are a food group all by themselves. As are Oreos - surely the most addictive substance known to humankind. I think this happened about the time that Marie got a urinary tract infection, peed all her trousers, was put into Charlie's nappies and then promptly decided never again to use a toilet. For any reason, liquid or firm. Yes, I think it was about that time that I started to leave a secret stash of chocolate and cookies next to the kettle so that I could sneak some any time I got a cup of tea. There's something about having to clean up a three year old's poo that will drive a woman to self-medicate with sugar and chocolate. Or this woman in any case.
Another vice I have picked up during my phlegmy vacation from all things joyful and rewarding is a brand-new addiction to my iPhone. I now get why all the other nerds are fused to theirs. It's only taken me a year since first getting the phone, but now I am also app-obsessed (appsessed?). I can spend hours rearranging them just so, downloading better shopping list compilers and prettier versions of Spider Solitaire.
Three of my new apps are called TargetWeight, CalorieCounter and DietApp. I was hoping they would come in handy to tackle the Snickers-Oreo belly of shame - until I found myself lying to my TargetWeight app about my weight. I think maybe I should forget about getting back into shape until my little snotty jailers let me out.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
Oh noooooooo! If I had to clean up a 3yr old's nappies, I would be self medicating with more than chocolate. You are a brave brave Mumma.
ReplyDeleteIs there a snot and poo app? I'm sure you have searched for one ;)
Get better soon, all of you!!
I spend an unreasonable number of hours playing checkers on my phone. I think that if I can get better by playing against the computer, I might actually beat my husband some day... I girl can dream.
ReplyDeleteDo you know it as draughts? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_draughts
ReplyDeleteShit. *a* girl can dream.
ReplyDelete@Rhi - I am so off to look for that app.
ReplyDelete@Steph - I play Scrabble. One of my few paid-for apps. (1.39 or something ridiculously expensive like that.)
I know both names - comes from having lived in the UK and being married to a Scotsman but also having watched WAY too much American TV. Like WAY too much.
snot and poo app!! HA! Get the koi fish pond one, it's so delightful. Will help with your bhuddism too.
ReplyDeletebuhddism. no. I can't spell that word. I would never qualify.
I think you're right about waiting. Definitely.
Welcome to the sad world of Apple addiction... my fitness friend is also a good one as is Getrunning
ReplyDeleteOreos addictive! I laugh in the face of your Oreos and wave Haribo Tangfastic in your face. An entire bag in one conference call, that's a party pack!!! oh and Doodle Jump !! Wlcome to the world of time wasting whilst weight gaining :)
ReplyDeleteOh, dear. We are debating getting iPhones and I think you may have just convinced me not to.
ReplyDeleteNow please- all of you people there- get WELL!
It's impossible to even think about reaching target weights when your sick or, worse, looking after other sick people. Stick to your chocolates and iPhone aps for now!
ReplyDeleteGet well!
ReplyDeleteAnd, boy, am I ever addicted to my iPhone apps!
Chocolate makes you better when your sick fact!! I, myself can prove that.
ReplyDeleteBNM
Chocolate is widely recognized as an effective anti-depressant. The widely being my wide hips.
ReplyDelete@Jo - Must look it up. Thank you! About the waiting, I'm not sure. It just gets harder to get back to normal after a while. I was marginally better today. Only one medium-size chocolate muffin was consumed. As my four o'clock snack. So that was better.
ReplyDelete@Muddling Along - Sigh... Maybe next week. I will. I should. I shall.
@Kelloggsville - Wow, I bow to the master!
@Ms. Moon - Oh but they are so lovely. So pretty. So shiny. So very very fun.
@Lady Mama - Mmmm chocolate. And I do have the excuse of the snot. I do. And I've just run out of medicine.
@Angie Muresan - They are sneaky.
@BNM - Does it? Well, I need more then because I've just run out of medicine. Thank you for that fact!
@nmaha - Giggle. Yours and mine.
Oreos are just starting to catch on here. Before they were only sold in snack packs of 4 Oreos per pack in the foreign food sections. Now I can get a whole roll of them.
ReplyDeleteMy preference is dip in a glass of milk for 5 seconds- no more, no less.
I may need to check these apps. It's a very unhealthy relationship--me and my phone. If I had to choose between my family and phone--it would be a really hard decision. I think I need the "you're a FAT ASS get off your ASS stop EATING app." Let me know if you find that one!
ReplyDelete