Right, people, I will beat this bloody blogger's block if it fucking kills me. One post a day was easier when I still thought it would fascinate you all endlessly if I reported on my every fart. (Not that I ever fart, mind you, because I am a lay-dee.)
My ongoing sleepless nights have me sitting in the sofa "watching" pre-recorded TV shows during morning naptime instead of blogging (I'd admit to being slumped over, snoring, and drooling out of the side of my face if I wasn't a lay-dee). And then there's my frigging diet, which is making the kilos melt away (slowly, slowly, eaty monkey) but it's making me feel rather empty-headed and lethaaargic.
But all this crap has a bright side as well, of course: while I have absolutely no inspiration when I'm faced with the dreaded and seemingly endless white space of the "New post" page, I have now gone a whole six weeks without being asked when my baby is due. I have also, in the last nine months, had only one bout of self-induced insomnia. A record, surely. But it does rather limit the idle blog time.
Nevermind, dearest people. All this is a thing of the past. I have decided that as soon as Charlie's fourth tooth breaks through fully, he will be the best sleeper we've ever had. Also, I am taking a daily vitamin supplement to increase my energy levels (with ginseng, people, this is foolproof) so I will no longer need my morning naps. Now all I need to do is sabotage my offline social life, and I'll be back to blogging away my new-found sleepless nights.
I really don't know why they haven't put me in charge of the UN yet. I'm such a planner.